Friday, September 30, 2011

Wife Ko Yakeen Tha



Wife ko yakeen tha ke pati aur Noukrani ka relation hai,
pakadne ke liye plan banaya

aur naukrani ko chupke se chutti pe bhej diya,

raat ko pati ka pet dard hua aur wo toilet gaya, wife noukrani ke bed pe jaa ke so gayi,

aur light off kar di

room mein kaam shuru ho gaya

kaam karne ke baad
wife boli: tum mujhe yaha dekh ke chakit hoge

& light on kar di

Watchman bola: sorry Madam

Moral: jo zyada smart banta hai, uske saath aise hi hota hai..!!

Ek Kavi Kangali Se Tang Aa Kar

Ek Kavi Kangali Se Tang Aa Kar
1 kavi kangaali se tang aa kar daaka dalne bank gaya or kaha-
Arz hai,
Takdeer mein jo hai wahi Milega..
Hands Up koi apni Jagah se nahi Hilega.
Cashier se- Apne kuch khwab apni aankhon se nikal do, jo kuch bhi tumhare paas ho wo is bag mein daal do.
Bahut koshish karta hu teri yaad bhulane ki, koi koshish na kare police ko bulane ki,
Jate huye arz hai- Bhula de mujhe kya jata hai tera, main goli maar dunga jisne picha kiya mera.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Ek Jungle Mein Cheeta

Ek Jungle Mein Cheeta
Ek Jungle Mein Cheeta Bidi Pine Wala Tha Ke 1Chuha Aya Or Bola
Bhai, Nasha Chhod Do, Aao Mere saath, Dekho Jungle Kitna Khubsurat Hai.
Cheeta Chuhe Ke saath Chal Dia.
Aage Hathi Drugs Le Raha Tha. Chuhe Ne Usey Bhi yahi sab Kaha, Haati Bhi saath Chal diya. Aage Sher Whisky Pine Wala Tha. Chuhe Ne Usey Bhi kaha. Sher Ne Glass Rakha Or Chuhe Ko 5 Jhapad Mare. Haathi- Kyu Maar Rahe Ho Bechare Ko?
Sher- Iss saale Ne Kal bhi bhang pi ke Mujhe 3 Ghante Jungle Mein Ghumaya tha !!

Monday, September 26, 2011

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Father To Son

Father To Son
Papa-Beta, vehla na baith Padai kar lai.

Son- Fer ki houga?

Papa- Fer tenu jada knowledge milugi.

Son- Fer ki houga?

Papa- Fer tere vadia number aunge.

Son- Fer ?

Papa- Fer tenu vadia college admission milugi.

Son- Fer ?

Papa- Fer tenu vadia job milugi.

Son- Fer ?

Papa- Fer tenu vadia salary milugi.

Son- Fer ?

Papa- Fer tere bade naukar-chakar honge.

Son- Fer ?

Papa- Fer tenu koi kam ni karna pena, Tu bas beh ke aram kari te aish kari.

Son- TE HUN MAIN KI KARDA PYAAN?

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Ek Ladki Roz Gali Se

Ek Ladki Roz Gali Se
1 Ladki roz gali se guzra karti thi...
apne chehre ko naqab se dhak kar rakhti thi,
1ladka uspe marta tha...
shayad wo use dil se pyar karta tha,
1din ladki ne us ladke ke padosi se pucha.
kaha gya wo aashiq ?
to usne bataya aapko aane mein der ho gayi,
us diwane ki kal rat maut ho gayi,
Padosi ne apna farz nibhaya,
ladki ko qabar tak le aya,
Ladki qabar par rone lagi,
apne aansu se qabar ko dhone lagi,
Qabar se aawaz aayi,
"A KHUDA YE KESA INQALAB AYA Hai,
AAJ MEIN PARDE MEIN HU OR MERA MEHBUB BENAQAB AYA Hai..

Friday, September 23, 2011

Dosto Ki Judai Ka Gum Na Karna



Dosto ki judai ka gum na karna,
Door raho to bhi dosti kam na karna,
Agar mile zindagi ke kisi mod par hum,
To humein dekh kar apni aankhein band na karna....

Thursday, September 22, 2011

I Was Talking About My Exams



BF: I cheated..
.
GF: So what? Do you think i love you?
I was cheating on you 4 d past 2 years. You are just for fun!
.
BF cried and said: you bitch.. i was talking about my exams..:

Bari Barsi Khatan Gaya Si


Bari barsi khattan gaya c,
khat khat ke leyandi TIE.....
Jehda eh msg agge na bheje....
Oh "moge aali pinky" da bhai...

Kis Hadd Tak Jana Hai

Kis hadd tak jana hai kon janta hai,
Kis manzil tak janta hai ye kon janta hai,
PYAR ke do pal jee bhar ke jee lo.
Kis roz bichadna hai ye kon janta hai.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Monday, September 19, 2011

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Shikwa Uski Yaadon Se is Tarah Kiya Humne


Shikwa uski yaadon se is tarah kiya humne,

hasti huyi shama ko rula diya humne,

ek lamha diya tha usne jine ke liye,

aur usme zindagi ko bita diya humne..

Friday, September 16, 2011

Kya Kar Rahe Ho


Girl - Kya kar rahe ho.
Boy - Makhiyan maar raha hoon.
Girl - Kitni mari.
Boy - 5, 3 male & 2 Female.
Girl - Kaise pata.
Boy -3 Beer bottle pe chipki thi aur 2 phone par.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Monday, September 12, 2011

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Boy Date te Gaya


Boy Date te Gaya
After dinner Ahista se bola
Main tenu kuch kehna hai,
tu Naraz te nahi howengi?

Girl sharma ke-Nahi tusi Kaho na.

Boy-Bill adha adha kar laiye?

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Friday, September 9, 2011

I Can do Anything 4 You


Boy- i can do anythng 4 you.
Girl- Will you die 4 me?
Boy- yes..
Girl- Will you delete your facebook a/c 4 me?
Boy- ja bhen ja ghar ja tere papa pareshan ho rahe honge..

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Boy Loved A Girl


Boy loved a Girl very much....
He proposed but she didn't mind.
The boy approach the girl for the last time, that time a truck was speeding towards the girl, the boy ran fast and saved her, She asked....
How can you run so fast? the boy replied,
"Boost is the secret of my Energy" and instantly the girl shouted "OUR ENERGY" and they lived happily together drinking boost everyday.

Moral of the story:
I have free msgs so i can send whatever i want..

Tumhare Pen Mein INK Nhi Hai Kya


Sweet Flirt:
Boy: Tumhare Pen mein INK Nhi hai kya?

Girl: Andhe ho kya?
Chal to Raha hai..!

Boy: Accha to Apna mobile Number
Likh ke Dikhao.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Its Challenge For You


Its challenge 4 u...
ye 5 chezen hain jo hum roz dekhte hain...
spelling theek karna hai:

1.bloemi
2.lanbeac
3.beut ghtil
4.rtas lpsu
5.rirorm

Dimag lagao...DIMAG!..reply.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Wife's Letter To Husband

Wife's Letter To Husband
Village mein 1 lady thi..
Us lady ko letter likhna tha apne husband ko, Par wo janti nhi thi ke full stop kaha lagana hai..
Isliye jaha mann wahi laga deti thi..

Toh Letter kuch aisa hua:-
mere pyare
mera pranam apke charno mein. Apne abhi tak chithi nai likhi meri saheli ko. nokri mil gayi hai hamari gaai ko. Bachda diya hai dadaji ne. Sharab ki lat laga li hai maine. tumko bhaut khat likhe par tum nahi aye kutte ke bache. Bhedia kha gaya 2 mahine ka rashan. Chuti par aate samay le aana ek khubsurat aurat. Meri saheli ban gai hai. Aur is samay tv pe gana ga rai hai hamari bakri. Bech di gayi hai tumhari maa. Tumko bahut yaad kar rhi hai ek padosan. Humein tang karti hai tumhari Dasi. Gud night.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Friday, September 2, 2011

Jaagat Jot Shabad


Jaagat Jot Shabad Guru Dhan Dhan Shri GURU GRANTH SAHIB Ji de Parkash Purab Dian Lakh 2 Wadhayian.

Waheguru ji ka Khalsa
Waheguru ji ki Fateh..

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Diary Of A Baby

Diary Of A Baby
DIARY OF A BABY 15Jun: I got attached with ovary. 17Jun: I am a tissue now. 30Jun: Mom said to dad, "You're going to be a father" MOM AND DAD ARE VERY HAPPY. 15Jul: My food is what my mom eats. 15Sep: I can feel my heartbeat. 14Oct: I have little hands, legs, head and a stomach. 13Nov: Today I was in an ultrascan. Wow! I m a girl. 14Nov: I was DEAD! My mom and dad killed me. . . WHY? :( Is it just because I was a girl? People love to have A MOTHER, A WIFE, AND OF COURSE A GIRLFRIEND TOO THEN WHY NOT A DAUGHTER!?! IF You're A Human. . . PASS IT TO EVERY INBOX.15Jun: I got attached with ovary. 17Jun: I am a tissue now. 30Jun: Mom said to dad, "You're going to be a father" MOM AND DAD ARE VERY HAPPY. 15Jul: My food is what my mom eats. 15Sep: I can feel my heartbeat. 14Oct: I have little hands, legs, head and a stomach. 13Nov: Today I was in an ultrascan. Wow! I m a girl. 14Nov: I was DEAD! My mom and dad killed me. . . WHY? :( Is it just because I was a girl? People love to have A MOTHER, A WIFE, AND OF COURSE A GIRLFRIEND TOO THEN WHY NOT A DAUGHTER!?! IF You're A Human. . . PASS IT TO EVERY INBOX.