Monday, March 31, 2014

Ladki To Doctor

Ek Ladki Nervous Haalat Mein Doctor Ke Pass Gayi Aur Boli,
Ladki: "Specialist Saab Maine Galti Se Apni Bhabhi Ki I-Pill Ki Goli Kha Li,
Ab Main Kya Karun?
Specialist: "Bindaas Ghumo, Doston Ko Khush Karo, Ab Tum 72 Ghanton Ke Liye Prepaid Ho Chuki Ho,
Jaa Aish Kar, Jee Le Apni Zindagi.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Diverse Varieties of Mom

Diverse varities of mom..!!

Darane wali MUMMY
"ek thapad padhega to theek ho jaoge"

Aalsi MUMMY
"ek baat tumhe kitni bar batani padhti hai"

DHAMKANE WALI MUMMY
"Aane do father ko, tumhari shikayat karungi"

Purani MUMMY
"Jab main tumhari umar ki thi to ghar ki sari zimedari sambhalti thi"

Future jaanne WALI MUMMY
"Mujhe pata tha, yeh tute ga"

Befuddled MUMMY
"main insan hu k machine ?"

Egotistical MUMMY
"lunch mein parathe tumhare liye diye the ya tuhmare dosto k liye?"

SHAKKI MUMMY
"10 mein se 10 no..
zarur tumne duping ki hogi"

AAJ kal ki mother :
aag lage tere mobile ko, saara din isi mein ghusa rehta hai

Par in sab ke baad bhi BEST hai hum sabki MUMMY..

Adore you mother..

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Child Fails in Exam

Child FAILS IN EXAM-

Father: Aaj se mujhe daddy mat kehna...

Kid: Oh, go ahead father,

it was simply a school test not the DNA test...!

Shaking Generations..

Friday, March 28, 2014

A Gentleman Strove For a Interview

A gentleman strove for a interview at an enormous IT organization today for the position of 'Machine Hacking Investigator.'

The manager asked him , "Thus, what makes you suitable for this employment?"

"Well," he answered, "I hacked into your workstation and welcomed myself to this interview."

Thursday, March 27, 2014

The Smoking Kills Cautioning on Cigrette

The Smoking kills cautioning on cigrette packs is similar to

Young ladies saying " Rehane do !! koi dekh lega "

simply a convention.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Sari Raat Assi Number Usda Launde Rahe

Sari Raat assi Number usda launde rahe,

Customer care wale koi hor hi kahani paunde rahe,

Machine wali bibi kehndi sajan tuhade kise hor nal occupied ne,

Assi re-dial te re-dail dabonde rahe,

Raat to swer hon te aa gai number hale v busy c,

Swere hoi jdo mulakat,

iljam ik duje te launde rahe,

Gusse vich call register check kita ta pata laga,

Assi ik duje da iko time te number milonde rahe...

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Pagg Bann Ke Gabhru Jad Tyar Hunde

Pagg Bann Ke Gabhru Jad Tyar Hunde,

Muchh Chakk Ke Bullet Te Swaar Hunde,

Loki Chad Ke Chubare Ton Takde Ne Te Sochde Ne,

Kaash Asi V Sardaar Hunde..

Friday, March 21, 2014

Mother To Daughter

Mother: You are pleasantly dressed up....

where are u going sweetheart?

Girl: Thanx a great deal mother,

I'm setting off to the washroom as i need another facebook profile picture.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Aradhya To Abhishek Bacchan

Abhishek Bacchan to his babe Aradhya:
"Baby I am a super star in "Bollywood"
Aradhya to AB afterwards searching at the mobile:-
"No Ullu banaaing..
No Ullu baanaing"

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Very Admirable Moment

Very admirable moment
When you are sleeping and your mom comes and put blanket on you.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Ye Engineering Nahi Asaan

Ye Engineering nahi asaan,
bas itna Samjh lijiye,
Ek laal Mirch ki Kulfi hai,
Or Choos ke khaani hai..

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Wife - Aapki Blue Shirt Mujh Se Jal Gayi

Wife: Aapki Blue Shirt Mujh Se Jal Gayi.!!
Husband: Mere Paas Waisi Ek Aur Shirt Hai.!!
Wife: Pata Hai, Maine Usme Se Kapda Kaat Ke Pehle Wali Mein Laga Diya Hai.!!

Friday, March 14, 2014

Its Not a Accomplishment

Its not a accomplishment to accomplish 100 friends in a year.
But
A accomplishment in year to accomplish 1 friend for 100 years.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Dil Mein Tamannaon ko Dabana Seekh Gaye

Dil mein tamannaon ko dabana seekh gaye,
Gam ko ankhon mein chhipana seekh gaye,
Mere chahre se kahin koi baat zaahir na ho,
Daba ke hothon ko ham muskrana seekh gaye.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Rahul Gandhi To Aamir Khan


Rahul Gandhi: Mujhe desh ki bahut fikar hai,
par main Satyamev Jayate nahi dekh paunga!
Aamir Khan: Kyu?

Rahul Gandhi: Kyuki us time Chhota Bheem aata hai !!!

Monday, March 10, 2014

Kismat Pehle hi Likhi ja Chuki Hai


"Kismat pehle hi likhi ja chuki hai
to koshish karne se kya milega?"

Best Answer: "Kya pata kismat mein likha ho ki"
"KOSHISH SE HI SAB MILEGA".

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Johnny-Johnny Rhyme (Engineering Version)

Johnny-Johnny Rhyme. (Engineering Version) Jhonny, Jhonny? - Yes, papa!
Placement hua? - No, papa!
Lots of tension? - Yes, papa!
CGPA? - Low, papa!
Personal life? - Lost, papa!
Top karoge? - HAHAHAHA!

Friday, March 7, 2014

Moment Which Almost Came In Everyone's

Moment Which Almost Came In Everyone's School Life !
When A Teacher Points At You And U Look Behind !
And Then Say : "Who? Me?"

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Very Touchy Love Story


Ek Din Chidiya Boli : Mujhe Chhod Kar Kabhi Tum Udd Toh Nahi Jaaoge??
Chida : Udd Jaauon Toh Tum Pakad Lena..
Chidiya : Main Tumhe Pakad Sakti Hu Par phir Paa Nhi Sakti..
Chida Ki Aankhon Mein Aansu Aa Gaye Ussne Apne Pankh Tod Liye..
Chidda Bola : Ab Hum Hamesha Saath Rahenge..
Ek Din Bhot Zor Se Toofan Aaya Chidiya Udd Ne Lagi..
Tabhi Chida Bola : Tum Udd Jao Main Nahi Udd Sakta..
Chidiya : Apna Khayal Rakhna Keh Kar Udd Gayi..
Jab Toofan Thama Aur Chidiya Wapis Aayi Toh Usne Dekha Chida Mar Chuka Tha
Aur Ek Daali Par Likha Tha..
Kaash Tum Ek Baar Toh Kehti Ke Main Tumhe Nahi Chod Sakti Toh Shayad Main Toofan Aane Se Pehle Nahi Marta.....

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Difference Between Insult & Achievment


Difference between insult & achievement??

If u cry seeing your qustion papr itz an insult.

BUT

If u make your teacher cry seeing ur answr paper itz an achievement.

Monday, March 3, 2014

Lover and Friend Mein Kya Fark Hai ?


Lover and friend mein kya fark hai??

Socho

Lover:- tumhe kuch hua to main jinda Nahi rahunga

&

Friend:- jab tak main jinda hun tumhe kuch nahi hone dunga.

Only Two Types of Persons


"Only two types of persons are happy in this world.
First is a Mad person
and
Second is a Child.
So Be Mad to achieve what you desire and
Be a Child to enjoy what you have achieved."

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Dekho Meri Aankhon Mein Khawaab Kis ke Hain



Dekho Meri Aankhon Mein Khawaab Kis ke Hain ?!?
Dekho Mere Dil Mein Toofan Kis ke Hain ?!?
Tum Kehte Ho Mere Dil Ke Raste Se Koi Nahi Guzra,
To Phir Yeh Pairon Ke Nishan Kiske Hain ?!?