Hum wo ENGINEER Nahi Hain

Hum wo ENGINEER Nahi Hain,
Jinke Hatho mein Alternate Current ya Direct Current se jhatke Lag jaate Hain..
Hum to wo logon mein se Hain,
Jo SHORT-CIRCUIT se "Cigarette" Jalate Hain.

Khubsurat Insan Se Mohabbat Nahi Hoti

Khubsurat Insan Se Mohabbat Nahi Hoti,
Balke Jis Se Mohabbat Ho Jaye,
Wo Khubsurat Lagne Lagti Hai,
Rishte Khoon Ke Nahi Hote,
Rishte Ehsaas Ke Hote Hain,
Agar Ehsaas Ho To Ajnabi Bhi Apne,
Agar Ehsas Na Ho To Apne Bhi Ajnabi Hote Hain.

Girl Said I Love You To Boy

Girl: I Love You.
Boy: Hahaha.
Girl: I Miss You I Miss You
Boy: Hahahahaha
Girl: Main Tumhari Khatir Apni Jaan Bi De Sakti Hu,.
Boy: hahahahahahaha.
Girl: Tumhare Bina Main Zinda Nahi Reh Sakti,.
Boy: hahahahahahahahahaha
Girl: Mere mummy daddy ek week ke liye bahar jane wale hain.
Main ekdum akeli rahungi ghar mein.
Boy: Kab?.
Girl: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Boy: kab jaanu ??
Girl: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahhaahahhaahhahahahahaha.

When I Asked Myself How to Handle Life ?

When i asked myself how to handle life?
My room gave me the right answer -
Roof explained: Aim high
Fan Stated: Be awesome
Clock explained: Value time
Calendar explained: Be informed
Wallet explained: Save today for long term
Mirror explained: observe yourself
Wall explained: Share other peoples load
Windows said: Expand the perspective
Floor explained: Always be as a result of earth..
I then looked @ my own bed
In addition to he explained: chaddar taan ke soja....
sab moh maya hai...

An Engineer Unsuccessful In Exam

An engineer Unsuccessful In exam!
He Stated 2 The Teacher: I will ask Ough a Issue,
If oughout don't answer, u'll get 2 offer me 'A' Grade.
Teacher: ALL RIGHT
Engineer: Whats Legal But is not Logical,
Logical But is not Legal & Neither Logical Or Legal...?
Tutor Couldn't Response,
He Afforded Him 'A' Grade..
Later the actual Engineer Responded to:
Sir, Ough R 63 Years Old & R Wife Can be 30,
Datz Legal But is not Logical.
Ur Wife Includes a 25 Years Old Man,
Its Logical But is not Legal.
Today U Have Given R Wife's Partner A Grade!!!
That's Neither Logical Or Legal.

Husband Excuse List To Spouse

Monday Night:
Spouse: Aaj tum daaru peeke aaye ho! Kyun?
Husband: Arre Aaj company mein overseas clients ke saath meeting thi to peeni padi
Tuesday Night:
Spouse: Aaj tum fir daaru peeke aaye ho! Kyun?
Husband: Arre Aaj ek friend ki engagement party thi to Usne gathering ki isliye.
Wednesday Night:
Spouse: Aaj bhi tum peeke aaye..
Husband: Arre Aaj ek friend ka breakup ho gaya...
WO bahut udaas tha to Uska mood fresh karne ke liye...
Thursday Night:
Spouse: Aaj fir se...
Ab kiska breakup ho gaya?
Husband: Breakup nahi....
Aaj Office ka work load bahut tha...
bahut tension thi isliye.
Exclusive Night:
Spouse: Aaj kyun?
Husband: Arre jis friend ki engagement party thi na Wednesday ko,
Aaj uski shaadi thi...
to khushi ke mauke pe to....
samajh gayi na
Saturday Night:
Spouse: hmmm... Abs?
Husband: Aaj purane university friends mil gaye the to Wo disco le gaye aur zabardasti pila di...
maine bahut mana bhi kiya par maane nahi...
Weekend Night:
Spouse (gusse se): Ab Aaj kya ho gaya..
Husband: AAJ MERA MOOD THA.

Secretary To Boss

Boss-Tumhari ability?
Lady Secretary-
Youthful hu,
Vibrant hu,
Sincere hu,
Truthful hu,
Industrious hu,
Certified hu,
Knowledgeable hu,
Worthwhile hu,
Writing janti hu,
Data file sahi rakhti hu,
Computer mein professional hu,
Thoda balances bhi janti hu,
Boss: aur kuch
Lady: Disease free aur healthy hu,
Real estate agent T lagayi hai,
7 position aati hai,
69 mein Expert hu,
aur
Sabse Jaruri Baat okay
Apne flat mein akeli rehti hu...!
Boss: bas kar pagli,
abs kya joining ke Din promotion legi!!!!

Dhan Dhan Guru Angad Dev Ji

DHAN DHAN GURU TEGH BAHADUR JI TE DHAN DHAN GURU ANGAD DEV JI de Prakaash Purab diyan samoh sangtan nu beant beant Wadhaiyan..
Waheguru sab te kirpa kare...
Sat Sri Akaal !!

Asi Sher Haan Guru Dashmesh De

Asi Sher Haan Guru Dashmesh De,
Kaun Ho Sakde Sanu Atkaun Wale,
Jag Janda Asi Nahi Muk Sakde,
Muk Gaye Sanu Mukaun Wale.

As Soon as Your Phone Battery is at 1%

As soon as your phone battery is at 1%
and you also are running towards the phone charger like-.
"Mere saath reh bhaai..
aankhein band mat karna..
tujhe main kuch nhi hone dunga! ".

Sonakshi Sinha To Kejriwal

Sonakshi Sinha: Thappad Se Darr Nahi Lagta Sahab,
Pyaar Se Lagta Hai!
Kejriwal: Tu Rahne De Behan,
Mujhe pade hain mujhe pata hai.

People Abusing Yuvraj Singh

People abusing Yuvraj Singh:
*Don't neglect, he was the person due to whom India won the world Cup.
*He has been the one of several person who fulfilled Sachin's 22 years old dream.
*He was usually the one who gave us glorious Six 6's moment
*He is the one who may have given good deal and great deal of other wins.
Its cricket, It is game.
A number of day people score, some day people floor..!

Status of Cricket

Gadar -For ‪IndVsPak ‬match
Chak De : For ‪IndVsAus ‬match
Lagaan -For ‪IndVsEng ‬match
Ramayan- For ‪IndVsSL ‬match.

Pappu To Sunny Leone

Sunny Leone: Ragini Mms 2 mein main sab ko dara ke rakh dungi.
Pappu: Darr To Aapki pehle ki movies mein bhi lagta tha____

Kahi peeche se mummy papa na aa jaye.

A Nursery Boy Proposes a Girl

A nursery boy proposes a Girl: I Love you...
Girl Replies: Ek thapad marungi khichke.
Boy Replies: Mukka to jese tu khayegi nahi phir?
badhi aayi thapad marungi.

Very Best Joke of the Day

Teacher: hamesha kaho ki mujhe sab pata hai...
Beta at Home: Papa mujhe sab pata hai
Papa: beta ye 50 ruppee le aur chup rehna.
Aunty to bas milne aati hain.
Beta: Mummy muje sab pata hai.
Mummy: beta ye 100 ruppee le aur chup rehna.
Raamu kaka to room saaf karte hain bas.
Beta (nokar se): Raamu kaka mujhe sab pata hai.
Ramu kaka: sab jaanne ke baad bhi apne baap ke gale nahin lagega pagley.....!!